Betty Pender

Still Missing You

They say there is a reason
They say that time will heal
But neither time nor reason
Will change the way we feel.

For no one knows the heartache
that lies behind our smiles,
No one knows how many times
we have broken down and cried.

We want to tell you something
so there won't be any doubt,
You're so wonderful to think of
but so hard to be without.
We cannot bring the old days back,
when we were all together
The family chain is broken now,
but memories live forever.

Unknown

SORRY FOR THE LACK OF CANDLES, STILL TRYING TO GET ME ACT TOGETHER. MY HEAD IS SPINNING ALL THE TIME. SO I'M SEND YOU SO MUCH EXTRA LOVE. HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL WEEKEND. ALL MY LOVE GLORIA ANTHONY'S MOM XOXO

Gloria Anthony'S Mom (GTS Friend) July 31, 2009

Catch my kisses..♥
My angel above♥
They are all for you..♥
Sent with love♥

Catch my kisses..♥
My precious one♥
Shine bright for me..♥
Just like the sun♥

Catch my kisses..♥
As they float past the♥ moon
Oh why my angel..♥
Was you gone too soon♥


copyright� Jackie Thomas 20/07/09

Sandy Collins (Friend) July 30, 2009

Now the day has ended..
And it's time to say goodnight
I shall light your candle..
Blow a kiss
God bless..
Sweet dreams..
Sleep tight


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copyright� Jackie Thomas 29/07/09.

love sandy xxx

Sandy Collins (Friend) July 29, 2009

Florida

Had a great time in Florida, however thought about you a lot as the last time I was there was with Dad just after you died. I miss you so much Mum, sometimes it just doesn;t seem real and I want to scream from the tree tops. I feel so lost without you and I feel as if I have also lost Dad. He died when you died and I lost you both.

Love you for eternity xxxxx

Liz Hutchison (Daughter) July 22, 2009

♥ A Shade of Sadness. ♥


In comes the darkness to my soul
even as I sit in the early morning sun,
the distant sounds of the living
seem far removed from the fogginess of my mind.
♥
In the stillness of the house
which seems quieter than quiet,
time seems to pass too slowly.
♥
A feeling of being outside myself
looking back into an empty shell
of the person I used to be.
♥
I cry for my former self.
That person I once liked and enjoyed.
She is gone.
A loss within a loss, within a loss.
♥
A heaviness in my heart,
the weight of a million tears.
Drowning my emotions,
mixing and swirling in a pool of despair.
Ugly hateful despair.
♥
A sadness so deep and heavy
leaving the body tired and used,
I feel I could sleep,
sleep for a thousand years and never wake up.
♥
A thousand years will not change a thing.
You would still not be here.
What to believe, I don't know.
I just don't know. My soul is lost.
♥
I know not which way to turn.
Where to look,
♥
I feel helpless,
helpless to help my self,
annoyed with the daily things of life I must do.
♥
I don't care, not anymore.
The world could fall upon it's knees
it would not matter,
I am too shrouded in the darkness of my world
that spins ever out of control,
directing my emotions
with no warning as to what feelings
will be brought upon me next.
♥
There is guilt, another weight to bear.
Those who are with me, who I love and love me,
they need me, but I am not ready.
I hold them back at arms length,
I am not ready,
their demands draw on what strength I have left.
For that I am sorry,
but I cannot help bringing on the emotional distance.
There is a need to protect myself,
but from what I am not sure.
♥
There is anger.
Anger that occasionally swells within me.
There is no direction into which to fling this anger.
It is a new and different type of anger
not one I am familiar with and it disturbs me.
It makes me afraid.
♥
I try to be strong. For you, and only you.
I try to think what you would have me do.
♥
I know you would want me to live my life.
To continue on. It is not an easy task, not at all.
♥
Some days I can go out
and meet the world with vigor and say I do this for you.
♥
Some days I must crawl into my shell
and hide from the world that has been so cruel to me.
I am trying.
♥
The days are filled with thoughts of you,
and should I find myself not thinking of you,
I gasp for fear that I am forgetting you.
♥
I have learned to value life, you have taught me this.
To see the beauty in each day given to me,
even through this veil of sad darkness.
I know it is there waiting for me.
♥
Someday the sadness will lift
and I will only think of you
with a smile and warmness in my heart.
My love for you will always be there
that shall never pass
and I hope somehow you know this too.
♥
Your memory is only a heartbeat away.
I shall always love,
I shall always long for you,
I shall always wish to have you back.
And I shall live -- if only for you.
♥

WITH ALL MY LOVE, I WILL BE GONE FOR 2 WEEKS,ANTHONY'S GIRLFRIEND IS COMING TO VISIT ME, TILL JULY 24. TILL THEN ALL OUR BEAUTIFUL ANGELS WILL BE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS. LOVE GLORIA ANTHONY'S MOM XOXO

Gloria Anthony'S Mom (GTS Friend) July 6, 2009

Florida

Well Mum i'm off to Florida again for two weeks. Derek will be back on Monday and has promised to look after your plot for me. Stevanna is back tomorrow and I have no doubt she will be down as will Josh. The better keep it clean and make sure the plants are well atered or i'll beat them with a stick on my return! Keep us safe while we are away xxxx Love you Mum xxxx

Liz Hutchison (Daughter) July 1, 2009

Your Angel, Your Mother by Natasha Jordan

You look back on memories you forget you had,
And at times you'll smile, even though it hurts so bad.
Your Mother is a special woman, and no one can take her place,
You'll find a peace of mind when you remember her smiling face.

Your Mother is an Angel, now she flies high above the rest,
And in your hearts, always and forever, she will be the very best.
She has earned her wings, and it's time for her to fly,
I know it hurts, no one’s ever ready to say goodbye.

She knows you do not understand, and that you cry at night.
But as you finally drift off to sleep, let her memory hold you tight.
She will be your Guardian Angel, through the rest of your life.
Helping lead you on the road, between what’s wrong and right.

Your Mother loves you so much, and her love will always remain true
Please don't ever think for a second, that your Mother will forget you
A Mother’s love is like no other in the whole world
And she has the most wonderful memories, of her little boy and girl.

She has taken them with her, as she's flown away
Up to heaven free of pain, to her new home where she will stay.
So although you cannot see her, and you wish she could be there
Your Mother can always hear you, and your Mother will always care.

A Mother does not forget, the two greatest loves of her life
She loved nothing more than being your Mummy & your Daddy's wife
She is so proud of her family, and that’s in her heart to stay
Even though she's an Angel, and has had to fly away.

So as you cry your tears, remember your Mother’s love
Being sent to you from her, from the beautiful Heaven above.
She'll be there through your good times, she'll be there through your bad
She'll be there when you're happy, she'll be when you sad.

Your Mother has become an Angel now, It's her time to fly
And you will never know how much it hurt me
To watch you have to say goodbye.

Joanne Mitchell (Friend) June 29, 2009

Race for Life

Well we did it, the 10K Race for Life! We are very proud that we managed to do the whole 10K without passing out or needing oxygen (Laughing!). Jane, Anne and I raised approx �500 for Cancer Research. I have popped a photo in your album of the three of us prior to the race. Anne took her camera to the event so the rest of the photos will have to wait until I come back from holiday as Anne has no clue how to download them on to her PC never mind email them to me!!!! Anyway Mum we had a great time, the day was a huge success 8,000 turned up in support of Cancer Research. Can you imagine how much money we raised all together! Well proud xxxx I only wish they could have found a cure before you died, however perhaps one day soon, with all the research they are doing they will find a cure and thousands of other families will have no need to go through the pain that we have. Love you more everyday Mum xxx Foever in my heart xxx

Liz Hutchison (Daughter) June 29, 2009

Our Hearts Will Always Touch by Ranja Kujala

When I laid there beside you,
Could you feel me there?
My arms were wrapped around you,
And I was stroking your hair.

I was talking about all the good times,
For me they were every single day.
I wanted you to feel love and comfort,
And happy in some way.

I watched your every breath,
And prayed that each one wasn't your last.
The time we got to share together,
Went by too quick...Too fast.

I wanted you to wake up,
Please Mum...Open your eyes.
Tell me this is a nightmare,
And not our goodbyes.

As your last breath grew closer,
We lay there peacefully together.
My heart continually breaking,
Because I wanted you forever.

Then there it was,
Your final breath of air.
I didn't want to believe it,
This is so cruel, and not fair.

I held your beautiful face,
And prayed you'd breath again.
I wasn't ready for you to go,
I couldn't admit that this was the end.

But then I realized that you were now in peace,
And not suffering anymore.
You were beginning the life of an Angel,
And your body would no longer be sore.

I held you close and squeezed you tight,
And tried to say goodbye.
I've lost my Mum and my number one best friend,
All my heart could do is cry.

I slowly got up,
I wanted so much to stay.
I leaned over and gave you one more kiss,
It was so hard to walk away.

Mum you are my entire world,
And I miss you so very much.
I wish I could feel your loveable cuddle,
And your soft and gentle touch.

But for now I have to wait,
Until we meet again.
You will always be in my heart and thoughts,
My dear Mum and best friend.

Always and Forever,
Our hearts will always touch.
Always and Forever,
Your baby girl loves you so much.

Joanne Mitchell (Friend) June 25, 2009

Go Liz and Jane Anne

Hi Mum as I can't run for a bus these day's I will settle for sponsoring the girl's on there run to raise fund's for cancer research as it's what took you away from you're loving family far to soon,I know you will be with them to guide them on and make sure that they do not overdo it.I will have a pint and toast the girl's on there completion,and a wee brandy for you.
Love and Miss you alway's.

Raymond.

Raymond Pender (Son) June 17, 2009